Sunday, February 10, 2013

Twelfth Fear: The Convocation

So I'm hoping I can get this done without waking Danny. He's been pretty persnickety about lights at night lately, and I'm not entirely sure how to dim down the monitor.

Laptops confuddle me.

So...

Yeah...

Life's been pretty crazy lately.

Let me sum up a few things quick:


  • James is no longer with Anna. She had the balls to ask if his son was more important than her. He immediately replied with an obvious Yes, followed by a swift Fuck You for even asking such a crude question.
  • We're looking into moving back in together. One, it'll be easier for him to feel he has a purpose if he watches Danny while I work; two, I won't be so terrified with having to put Danny in daycare; and three, if we're in the same household, maybe he can get help from the county to get a job, too. We're not sure about that just yet, I need to talk to my employment counselor about what we'd need to do to get him the help he needs.
  • I got my taxes filed, and will be getting just under $6k! Holy cow! :D That'll really help out! I want to pay off my student loan right away so I can get back into school, then buy a cheap car (my dad will put me under his ins. again), then keep a nestegg for when I finally move out.
  • I need to get on the list for Section 8/subsidy housing ASAP. I love my aunt, I do, but I just got in another big fight with my uncle and I'm tired of his crap. Though, she says she's proud of me for actually sticking up for myself this time, and calling him out on being rude and hurtful. We've made up, and he apologized, but still. These screaming matches are getting ridiculous.
  • My birthday was alright, got pretty drunk on my tequila, James decided not to drink with me. Tequila doesn't sit well in his system; his body doesn't absorb it, so he either has to puke it out or he stays the same level of drunk because it won't leave his stomach. Weird, right?
  • I LEARNED HOW TO CROCHET AND I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF FOR IT. I made Danny a pair of slippers yesterday, and they fit so nice. :3 I should put a drawstring on them, though; they tend to fall off his (lack of) ankles, and I want him to be able to keep them on through his wiggling at night.
I think that's it. I CAN FINALLY DO ANOTHER FEAR POST! OH JOY!

The Convocation
The Storm, The Flock, Thunderbirds, Ziz, Roc, FEATHERED, PRE13

Description:
So, the Convocation is kind of an interesting fear. I don't find it particularly scary, but I don't think birds are scary in the least. I mean, what can they do to you that a rifle can't do to them? o_O

I like to hunt. I'm a damn good shot. Hunting birds isn't hard. Birds aren't scary.

But I guess some people find them scary, so Tada! Convocation1

The Convocation is a ginormous flock of black bird things. They look like seriously giant birds, black as night, and when they fly, their wings generate electricity and thunder, almost like a storm.

I guess I don't really know a whole lot about this Fear, there aren't a lot of accounts on it other than an "urban legend" of the Witch of Gatlinburg. When the Convocation takes a person, they become a host of sorts, called a Nest. The birds basically hollow out a body and live inside it, controlling it and whatnot. When they want to come out, they'll either make a slice on body they can fly out of, or they'll fly out of the mouth.

This Fear doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me, the more I think about it.

BUT IT DOES HAVE A FOS! :O

Fortress of Solitude: The Bleak Shore
Well, okay, this FOS isn't really too interesting.

It's a giant shoreline filled with black sand, I would assume on an ocean. There's a constant storm on the horizon. I guess their Nests use it to travel? I dunno exatly.

Like I said, it's not really that cool. :/

I don't know how they choose their victims, since again, there aren't a lot of reports to go by, but I've never heard of anyone surviving them. I mean, they either peck the flesh from your bones or turn you into a Nest. I've read somewhere that they can speak, and they'll give you the choice of either being a Nest or lunch, but that's only in one place. So who knows?

Thunder is an ominous sound, no?

Sorry if this is kind of short, there really isn't a lot of information on this Fear to go by.

Let's see, what else is new...

Um.

Oh, we have a date for Danny's baptism. Have I talked about that yet with y'all? April 7th at noon. I need to get some paperwork printed out and filled out and mailed out for that. I just got done with the paperwork needed for childcare assistance, gonna mail that in to my financial worker asap. Just sent an email to my employment counselor about school and what she thinks I should do and if my return's going to affect my assistance at all. I hope not, that'd be so freaking shitty...

I'd have more to talk about, but... I really want to cuddle my Danny boy tonight. My uncle decided today to verbally attack me, and I always get so drained and depressed afterwards. I mean, after he calmed down he apologized, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. I understand his concerns, and to be fair, if he'd DISCUSS things with me, I'd be much more receptive to them, but screaming them at me like I'm a fucking moron doesn't exactly leave me listening to a work he says. To my ears, it's pretty much "BLAHBLAHBLAH I AM AN ASSHOLE AND I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHAT ANYBODY THINKS BECAUSE I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG I HAVE BEEN AROUND LONGER THAN YOU SO I MUST KNOW SO MUCH MORE ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU THINK YOU KNOW!" Which is a complete crock of crap.

Then he started screaming about how he doesn't want me around anymore and how he thinks I'm a lazy, terrible mother because, instead of saying Foot to Danny, I say Footies, and instead of Teeth I say Teefers. Y'know, little baby words that children say that we think are cute. He thinks he knows so much more about this stuff because he gets parenting emails and joined a forum.

>_> Right. And yet when I use the internet as a resource for argument, I get my butt chewed?

I don't have time for his bullshit. Or patience. My anxiety's still pretty bad, even after being on prozac for nearly a month. My aunt thinks the psychiatrist will try upping my dose, but... Ugh, I have such an aversion to mental medications, it's like admitting to the world that I'm crazy. Then I have to get a diagnosis assessment from her to send to my employment counselor; when you go through a welfare-to-work program, they make you fill out a mental health screening thingy. When I was done, Bao, my counselor, was like, "Er... Are you seeing a therapist?? o_O" I told her I was, and a psychiatrist, and I'd just started medication. So she asked if I could get verification from them both on what they think about me working and what I should be able to handle. We'l see how that goes.

... Y'know, I took my sleep med almost 2 hours ago, and I'm still awake. A little disoriented, but still awake. I think it's time I logged off and got some shut-eye with my baby boy. I miss cuddling with him. <3

Night everybody. I missed writing for you all!